My car was stolen from my garage a few days ago. It is a 2001 Honda Accord, just 2 months away from being paid off. It had a snowboard rack on it, a wallet with $400 cash, an I-pod and all the CDs I have ever owned, and some other sentimental items.
I don't even want this car back I just made this flyer to tell you that I hate you, car thief. I hope you drive my car and get hit by a monster truck. I hope my car takes you straight to hell.
(Disclaimer: This is taken from a funny flier that someone made about their missing bike. I just changed a few things and don't worry, I don't really wish that on anyone!)